


Pictures of You

by Vorcha_Girl



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Action, Breaking and Entering, Gen, Hero Worship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-30
Updated: 2015-05-30
Packaged: 2018-04-01 22:58:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4037776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vorcha_Girl/pseuds/Vorcha_Girl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Conrad Verner goes looking for Shepard's extranet address (and some tasteful pictures) the only way he knows how.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pictures of You

“Exactly what do you think you’re doing?”

Conrad froze as the drawled question shattered the silence of the office, the slight nasal tone alerting him to the identity of the person behind him even before he turned around. His heart fluttered in his chest like a caged bird, and for the briefest of moments he considered dropping his prize and running away. It would be easy to ditch the file, jump the desk and vanish out the window onto the balcony before Udina could summon security.

_But what would Shepard do?_

The question drifted through his mind like the breath of a phantom, and he stiffened, rejecting the cowardly plan to run. No, he would stay. For the sake of his hero, he would see this through. His hand tightened on the data file and he slowly turned around; all he had to do was stay calm and talk his way out of the office.

How hard could it be?

“Co … Councillor Udina,” he stammered, the air thickening with tension as Udina’s face crinkled into an angry frown. “I was just … looking for the, uh …” _C’mon Conrad! Think! Shepard never let Udina shake her!_ “The uh, bathroom.”

“Really?” Udina crossed the room in three quick strides and glanced at the scattered papers and files on his desk, his cunning rat-eyes missing nothing. “And you had to walk all the way over here and go through my desk to work out that it _wasn’t_ a bathroom?” He set his coffee down and scowled at him.

Conrad’s stomach plummeted and he paled. _Shit. Shit. Shit._ He had to get out of here quickly! Udina was obviously onto him, and if he wasn’t careful he would lose everything he’d worked so hard to find! His pale gaze skittered nervously over the desk and settled on the coffee mug. Wisps of steam rose from the contents inside, and Conrad inched his way towards it, trying not to be obvious.

He reached out for it as he spoke, as though casually gesturing. _“_ No, I just saw the desk and thought that I would …”

In one quick desperate move he seized the coffee mug and hurled it at Udina. The councillor howled in pain as the fresh brewed coffee splashed over his face, scalding him, and the mug slammed into his nose with a _crack_. He staggered back a step, flailing blindly and hissing like vorcha as the liquid seared and blinded him.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Conrad chanted as he tore towards the balcony, guilt and fear spurring him on.

He didn’t look back as he heard Udina bellowing in pain, yelling loudly for security. Instead he pumped his legs furiously and sprinted the full length of the balcony, his fingers clenched tightly around the data file. He hurdled the railing, falling a full floor behind he hit the next balcony down, but with a groan of pain he scrambled up and kept going.

It had been stupid to sneak into Udina’s office and steal his file on Shepard, but it would be worth it to get her personal extranet address.

… And some tasteful pictures of her.


End file.
